Wednesday, December 5, 2012

VENTING


I know not everyone keeps up with FB or my blog and then there will be the people that won't see this either BUT here's a story/vent.

This 3rd pregnancy of ours was an awesome surprise. I really wanted to not find out the sex of the baby for the following reasons:

  1. I wanted the adrenaline rush at the end from not knowing.
  2. We found out with both girls and since this was a surprise I wanted it to be a surprise until the end.
  3. I wanted the girls to see the baby 1st so the 4 of us could have a special moment where just the 4 of us knew and then the girls could have the fun of going to tell our family in the waiting room.
  4. I didn’t want anyone wishing for a certain sex.

This was not supposed to be complicated. It was just a simple – let’s just be surprised – end of discussion.

After our 20 week ultrasound Josh really felt like he needed to know so together we decided that we would find out at our 24 week ultrasound. The ultrasound does feel more exciting when you know what you’re having but this way we could still keep it a secret so that there would still be that special moment where the girls see the baby 1st and then go and share with our family.

Now after finding out I feel like I have to say what it is???  I don’t feel like I should have to though!

Other couples have not found out – why is this such a big deal?

Some are adamant that it’s a girl; some are adamant that it’s a boy.

In a perfect world I’d love everyone to just say NON-GENDER specific words because if you’re not going to know until the end then why would you want to say one or the other if it ends up not being that one?

Someone said to me – you’ve made this too complicated. You should have just found out in the beginning and then you wouldn’t have had this problem.

 Why would we have had to find out just because the world wants to know? Whose child is this?

Maybe I’m overreacting or over thinking or who knows what – this has just been on my mind and it’s honestly been kind of upsetting. It shouldn’t be!

 I felt the need to vent. Everyone is entitled to vent!

So… this is why I wish we would have just kept it a surprise. What’s done is done.
 Now how to move on without letting it bother me…

4 comments:

Unknown said...

I'm sorry sweetheart if it's me that's giving you a hard time. I wanted Josh to be able to know, and I have been teasing you about gummy bear being a boy, but seriously if in March gummy bear is a girl I will love her with all that is in me, just like I would if it's a boy.

Now that you do know you can still make it just the girls going in and finding out, and the 5 of you should spend some time bonding. Really honey all I want is for you and the baby to be healthy! You know you are both loved.

So I'll drop it and if anyone asks you tell them it's not their baby so they don't need to know. Have fun with Josh keeping your secret! Use it now to build up your relationship with him and don't wiry about what anyone else says or wants to know!

You know how much I love you!!!!

Kate Caldwell said...

everyone will love u both n the baby boy or girl its u n joshes choice to share what ur having. I know its easier said then done but blow those ppl off who r making it stressful for u b.c. those dont seem to understand that what stresses u stresses baby no matter what gender it is. Ur families will love u guys no matter what u decide to do even if they arent happy w the decidsion they will still there for u guys and the baby. Keep that smile on ur face and when u get stressed think of ur lil family growing bigger and how important it is to stay as stress free as possible. still got love for u girlies miss u both!!

Amanda Miller said...

Who are you lil_mama? ;)

Unknown said...

The important thing is to remember. This BABY represents the love and union of both Man and Woman. And the other thing I want to say is. You are an incredible person. Unique in many ways. You are literally incapable of purposely hurting anyones feelings. The love you show these children will grow and blossom through the years and spread the happiness that you shine on peoples souls exponentially. For the rest of time. Congratulations on your third CHILD