3 Months & Updates & More from my last post

My blog is now set so that I have to approve who reads it. My last post got 3 anonymous comments so I wanted to change my settings so that it wasn't just public. I wish I was better at explaining my feelings so that people wouldn't misunderstand me. I like getting comments good or bad BUT I don't like that they were anonymous. If you're going to say something - just say who you are.

I also probably shouldn't be typing a blog when I'm more emotional than normal but when I feel like venting or talking about something a blog is a good way for me to feel better (in a way).

Most people know I'm a huge worrier. I worry about everything. I hate it. Some people would say - DON'T  WORRY then. Easier said than done!! I also OVERTHINK everything. Absolutely EVERYTHING and I'm trying to change that but I've still got a long way to go. I care too much about what people think about me.

A good friend told me "Try not to stress. Some ppl aren't meant to be in our lives long term. God has bigger better plans"

I need to keep reminding myself this.

On the other hand - everything that my head is saying could be completely opposite of what everyone else is thinking. It's like that saying - "Don't think too much you'll create a problem that wasn't there in the first place"

Everything is probably fine and people probably don't hate me or are probably not mad at me!?????

Anyways really need to work on not thinking negatively.

Josh -- God loves me more than anyone and I need to go to him more. Then I've got a husband who loves me so much. When I started typing this he was staring at the screen so I told him that I didn't want him to watch. He said do you know how sexy you look when you feel embarrassed. Then he moved away and said do you know how much the glow of the computer brings out your beautiful eyes. He loves me and my girlies love me = why do I need anyone elses approval? I had mentioned he was waiting to hear back about a new job. He did hear back but they haven't made a decision yet. We're just trusting that if he's meant to be there in will be all in God's timing.

Abby-- She had one week so far of her reading program. I can't remember if I mentioned that but she gets to go to a free reading program 3 different weeks in the summer to help improve her reading. She had a great time and we've been trying to keep up with all the "homework". Sometimes I totally forget about it and feel like a horrible mom. She is still a wonderful babysitter. She watches Josie while I'm in the shower, changes her diaper, brings her to me when I need to feed her, the list goes on. She'll say - Josie is hungry or she is getting tired etc. It's so cute. I love watching her talk to Josie. The other day we went on trains at Papa Randy's & Gramma Rosie's and she got scared and hopped off the train. I had the guy stop the train so she could get back on (They are just little trains). I wanted her to get back on so she wouldn't regret not going. I'm not sure why she gets so scared about things sometimes. Grammy even got a new cat and she'd stick her legs up on the couch so the cat doesn't "get her" but she's warming up to her (Coala- is her name). Otherwise she's still our sweet Abby. Love her infinity.

Jasmine--Still being Mrs. Stinker. Hehe - no she's really not a stinker all the time but she still has those moments. Sometimes when the girls fight I make them hug and kiss and then she's back to her sweet self again. Lately she has talked a lot about how she has asked Jesus into her heart and that everyone else should ask Jesus into their heart because otherwise they will go to Hell and Hell is a bad place. She said she wants to go to Heaven so that she can see all of her family in Heaven. I told her she needs to make sure she tells people about Jesus so that we can make sure all of our family will go to Heaven. A couple of nights she's had sleepovers and ever since I can remember she does this "whisper talk" its like she talks but its so soft I can't tell what she's saying. She use to sleep with us all the time so I've missed that. Love her infinity.

Josie -- Josie turned 3 months old already today. CRAZY. It seems like she went from newborn to sitting up and somewhat playing with toys in like one day. She smiles ALL the time and loves sucking on her hands / thumb. She has taking a paci a couple of times but no longer than about 2 minutes. She has also taken 2 bottles so far which has been a huge relief. Grammy sits her up more and makes sure the bottle and breastmilk is warm. Both times she has even watched TV. Grammy thinks that she'll take the bottle if she does these things because if she trys to cradle her like I hold her she won't take the bottle and then if the milk isn't as warm she doesn't seem to take it well either. Thankful she's in such good hands while I'm busy.
Josie always goes to bed around 9pm - sleeps until 3pm and then either gets up at 7 or 8am. She sleeps so well. I was thinking about moving her into her crib soon before she "knows" so that she can get use to it...but I love having her in the cosleeper next to our bed. It makes me too sad to think she's growing so fast. Love her infinity.

ME-- I've been cleaning quite a bit lately and am really completely booked. Very thankful for the new homes I've got. I posted that I was looking to hire help - but I'm still trying to work out all the details so I'm not quite sure what I'm doing to do yet. I've had to turn down a couple of jobs because of distance. I don't like saying NO.
I cancelled my ultrasound appointment for my gallbladder- I haven't had any problems since May so I didn't want the extra dr bills. Last Friday our stairs on our front entry deck fell down when I was walking up them. I fell and got 4 bruises. It hurt SO bad and my knees are still bothering me. Crazy how you don't know how much you use something until it's hurt. It's been awkward cleaning sometimes trying to figure out how to not put pressure on my knees. We're going up north this weekend so I'm pretty excited.Thinking about turning my phone off the entire time.