Josie's Birth Story (LONG)

This may be a little all over the place - and I'm sure there are grammar errors etc but still says what I want it to ;) It's long! =)

My c-section was scheduled for Tues March 26th at NOON but we had to be to the hospital at 10am.

Josh and I slept decent but both of us were very excited to just get to the hospital. Abby and Jasmine spent the night at Grammy Jill & Papa Jerry's house so they could come to the hospital with them.

We got the hospital sometime between 9:30am and 10am. This was the first time we had to use the new women's entrance instead of the emergency entrance. Josh pulled up to the doors and I was asked if I wanted a wheelchair (didn't need one this time like I did with Jasmine). When you walk in they have a welcome desk then someone brought me to the Maternity Ward part of the entrance while Josh parked the van.

The guy that brought me was very kind. Everyone I spoke with that day I told them we didn't know what we were having so I didn't have to explain that Josh and I knew, etc. ;)

We checked in at the maternity ward and then I was taking back to a little room to put on my robe and get my iv put in etc. Plus answer about 50-100 questions. I dislike IV's they are such a pain. At one point I had to carry my IV with me to go to the bathroom and part of it came off so I was bleeding all over the floor (didn't realize it right away) that felt awkward standing in the middle of the hall while they cleaned it all up. Thankfully I had another robe to cover the back of me LOL.

Most of the staff was pleasant, some were learning etc and at times moments felt awkward - especially with some of the men nurses who were about my age (funny story about one of them to come).

All of my family came to give me a hug before they waited in the waiting room then we just sat and watched TV. I was pretty calm - some nerves.

Fast forward to a little before NOON... I had to take an antacid - YUCK that was so bitter. I laughed and thought it was good my dad didn't have to drink that I don't think he could have done it. ;)
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I was taken back to the c-section room - I can't remember exactly what time but it was close to NOON. Josh  couldn't come in until they were done with the spinal. I would have rather had him there with me to hold my hand etc instead of the nurse there for support but she was very nice. As soon as they did the spinal I was numb almost immediately it felt like. Then they had to put tape on my belly to hold all my fat out of the way - that must have looked beautiful. Josh finally came in and then everything started. The only thing you really feel is just tugging and pulling. Then I the anesthesiologist said they were at my uterus and wouldn't be too much longer - I can't remember if Josh said she has lots of hair first or if they said it's a girl first - either way I remember both and then I just bawled as soon as I heard her sweet cry. She was born at 12:26pm so that didn't take too long.

As they were finishing my surgery I felt like all my weight was being held up by my shoulders - it was awful and hurt badly. Finally I asked if they could somehow prop the bed up because it hurt so bad.  They moved it a little bit but then I got very nauseous and threw up. I felt a touch better after that. I think that antacid made it worse. Thankfully the whole time though I got to watch the nurses clean up Josie - I just kept crying. She was absolutely beautiful and I kept saying I love her lips and her hair. Then they weighed her. At first it brought up kilograms or whatever so they switched it to lbs and as soon as it popped up 9lbs 10oz I cried again. I was really hoping she was going to be my biggest baby.

Once we were done Dr. Wisebaker said that everything went very well. Then we were ready to go to recovery. Our original plan was that once we were done in the recovery room we wanted to have the girls come to our room first so they could go back to the waiting room and announce BOY OR GIRL but when they had to wheel me out of recovery we had to be wheeled right past the waiting room so we had to come up with a new plan. We decided once I'm wheeled out that they would come into a little section before you got to the waiting room and then they could go tell. As they were walking back to tell my Dad was standing outside the waiting room and I thought for sure before they announced GIRL that he saw Josie's yellow hat and would have guessed girl 1st. He said he didn't see her hat though. So then they announced it. My sister got it on video if you check her FB page. I remember my sister saying IT's A GIRL! IT's a GIRL! Then Jasmine (Mrs. Detail) was like I was right! It's a girl! =) There were some I thought for sure it was a BOY!!

EVERY BODY!!! THOUGHT IT WAS A BOY!!! (That's why I was so touchy when people said HE/ HIM/ BOY etc). If it would have been a boy and everyone thought girl I would have been the same way. I can't imagine having anyone except JOSIE. She is absolutely perfect!

We originally picked up the names - Jenna Suh Miller and Joshua Stafford Miller but then we changed those to Josie Suh Miller and Jase Stafford Miller.

I'm so glad we chose Josie (pronounced JO-SEE) (no Z) - I love it. It means God will Add. I thought that was very fitting because I had always said I'd love to just have one more baby ... add one more ;). Her middle name is Suh (pronounced Sue) after the Detroit lions football player. Josh of course is a huge fan.

JOSIE SUH MILLER
3-26-13
9LBS 10 OZ 22IN

She is absolutely perfect. She looks a lot like both of the girls. I love that I can say MY GIRLIES!

We stayed in the hospital until Thursday. Thankfully they let us come home otherwise we would have had to stay until Friday. I actually was the most sore once we got home but I didn't want to be in the hospital bed anymore. Nurses and Dr's come in so many times it gets very tiring.

Most of the staff was pleasant some of the nurses were better than others and some just plain annoyed me. I just felt the most awkward when it was men nurses who were either younger than me or my age. One of the guys that was in training kind of made me laugh. The most awkward moment was when he came in on Thursday morning and the first question he asked was word for word.. "Have you farted yet?"
Thankfully I was able to say no! LOL how embarrassing. About the only thing I enjoy about the hospital stay is the room service. I ordered quite a bit including dessert most meals - why not?!? =)

We mostly had family visitors but here's a list of our visitors
Gramma Rosie, Papa Randy, Aunt Sissy, Uncle Boo Boo, Luke
Grammy Jill, Papa Jerry, Aunt Kelley
Great Gramma & Papa Carp, Aunt Debbie, Melissa, & Addy
My friend Andrew from work and his girlfriend Sara
My friend June and her husband Andy

THANK YOU FOR VISITING AND FOR THE GIFTS!! <3

Josh has been absolutely amazing through this whole process. I mean he is amazing anyway BUT he has helped me so much. Including changing the bulk of the diapers which he still continues to do. Anything I need - he's there.
The Monday before she was born we had went to breakfast and I said are you excited it's going to be a girl. He said I think I'm for sure more of a girl dad. I don't know what I'd do with a boy. There is just something about cuddling with your girls that you can't explain. I said don't tear up! He was like shut up! LOL That was  a very sweet moment. He loves his girlies more than anything and the look on his face when he holds Josie is just priceless. (When he holds any of his girlies too BUT)

Josie is doing great! She nurses great and the only time she really cry's is if she's being changed or if she's ready to be fed. Right now she's sleeping soundly in our hammock. She sleeps better during the day then at night but she did a lot better last night.

Since we've been home I've been quite emotional and have had some depression. It's crazy how all these emotions come after the birth of a baby. I am not depressed about having a baby - it's hard to explain.
Yesterday for example was hard because I just had a lot of thoughts going on like ..
Josh has to go back to work Monday, I hadn't gotten any sleep, I can't take the girls anywhere for spring break, I can't clean the house, I was sore, this is my last baby, I just felt like I wanted to be left alone, no help, no visitors, etc. Felt like a bad mom for not being with my big girls as much just a bunch of a stuff hit all at once. We had family over for Easter and I ended up crying and nursing in my bedroom. I didn't eat much and didn't talk much. Everyone could tell I was not myself. Some left and I didn't even say goodbye.

Josie slept better last night but mostly slept on a pillow between my legs or on top of me. I just slept when I could though and didn't worry where she slept. I needed sleep badly. So did Josh for work. Hopefully she'll continue to sleep well at night. The nights before I was her pacifier the entire night. It was all she wanted.
We tried 2 different pacifiers but she hasn't taken them. I'd prefer her not to use them but we thought we should try since I can't be the paci the entire night. I love her being with me and nursing but when I don't sleep that doesn't help. Abby and Jasmine both used paci's and nursed passed 8 months so if Josie ends up using one I'm not going to worry about it.

Thank you for all your prayers and for following along with my blog and Facebook.
I'm going to try to update my blog consistently - just not sure how often. ;)

If you can continue to pray that my emotions will improve and that things will continue to go well with Josie and my girlies that would be great.

Also I've still got to decide what to do about work. I have to decide a schedule that would work for me and let work know what that is. Then they'd have to let me know if that schedule would work for them or if they even need me to return. If I do return - that is so hard to think about at the moment. Oh how I'd love to be a SAHM. If I don't return then it's just the hassle of having to try and find something. I can still sub so that would still be in the mix. I could also try and clean again if needed. Just hard to know what to think when I have no clue what the future brings.

LOVE TO ALL!